Monday, April 29

Shockingly, this is the clearest analysis of one's personal beliefs I've ever seen.

Wednesday, April 24
Nerve.com "They would recognize his car. He'd drive up, and the bulls would be standing at the breeding stations, getting erections just from the sight of his Volvo."

Yahoo! News - Cancer Risk in Chips, French Fries, Bread - Study

Want to Super Size that tumor?

Monday, April 22
Yahoo! News - Controversial Shopping Mall to Open Near Auschwitz

How much do you want to bet the "fast food bar" is a McDonalds? It would be quite ironic.

Why McDonalds? Because having to ask for your burger flame broiled wouldn't go over very well.

Yahoo! Sports: Golf -

"Cristie Kerr kisses the plaster cast of golf legend Tiger Woods. As per women's golf custom, Kerr proceeded to ceremonially suck a golf ball through a garden hose."

Sunday, April 21
The Best Tech Prank

This is deliriously easy and mean. I love it.

The God Squad

"The country's senior Protestant is a gaping and mendacious anti-Jewish peasant; the leaders of official Jewry are cringingly yoked with him for the purpose of a disastrous crusade and meanwhile the cardinals are running a rape fiesta for twitchy "celibates.""

Friday, April 19
Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie

Probably for $cientologists.

VW unveils 1 litre/100 km car

You do the math.

Wednesday, April 17
CNN.com - Heads up for five-planet lineup - April 17, 2002

From EJ:

April 11, 2002 Posted: 8:20 PM EDT (0020 GMT)

(CNN) -- Round up the kids and the neighbors any time after dusk Wednesday night, April 17th. The skies will provide a show that can't be matched by television or the movies. The Empire is massing a fleet of Death Star battle stations for an attack against the only inhabited planet in the Solar System, Earth.

Earth's citizens are being led by the regional governments and media organizations to believe the objects appearing in their western skies are aligning local frozen planets and super giants.

This is a sad day for all humanity. And History won't be doing a rerun for decades!

Yahoo! News - Drug Tunnel Found Under U.S. Customs Lot


Tuesday, April 9
My Cat Hates You

And I hate cats.

The Cap'n's Unfortunate Valentine's Cards

Saturday, April 6
What Is Queer Food?

Do-it-yourself: Stop junk mail, email and phone calls

Stop the crap pileup!

Friday, April 5
KODAK: Taken On The Road-American Mile Markers

Matt Frondorf took a single photo every mile across the United States. America is 3,304 photos long!

Thursday, April 4
Army Men Porn

Samuel L Jackson Soundboard

The search is... OVER!

Wednesday, April 3
Entropy8Zuper! - Venustrap

I feel dirty.

Tuesday, April 2
Crane Accidents

That's right. Craneaccidents.com no less.

ScreamingMidget: Letters From The Editor: Grrrrr!

I love it when people have too much time on their hands - and a wicked streak.

The Random Masturbation Synonym Generator

Oh yeah.

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